So hey! We talk about what we like. But what do you really hate. What alcoholic beverages are so lame that it makes your balls hurt (if your a woman then exchange the word "balls" for "vagina parts".
Well for me it's pretty much anything made by Leinenkugel. The Berry Weiss was so gay that after I drank it... my but literally started to hurt. I also pretty much hate almost every sweet wine ever made. Part of my job is to sell wine. I hate listening to how much people "Just love Beringer White Zinfandale". And it's not all women either... or just gay dudes.... well not openly gay ones anyway.
And what fucking moron thinks that Riesling is the epitome of European wine?
I also really hate Texas wine. Being a Texan I should feel guilty, but I don't. Becker Vineyard sucks out loud. I've tried (literally) everything they make. I've probably done upwards of 40 catering events out there. Dr. Becker is a horses ass and his wine sucks out loud, as done pretty much all Texas wine. The weather here is just not consistent enough to grow good grapes. It's also over fucking priced. Becker thinks that he can sell a shitty bottle of Claret for $17 retail when you can buy Coppola (good fucking shit) for $15. Fucking douche bag. I also hate people who won't even try wine if it's not made in Texas.
Not even joking. I offered a couple a sip of wine about a week ago; the man (inbreeding in there somewhere) said "Is it Texas Wine?" "Then I don't wanna try it." I really hate people like that. Their view of the world is so fucking narrow that only good things can come from Texas.... but back to booze.
I obviously hate The Big Three of beer (BudMillerCoors). But I really hate Sam Adams too. They spend so much fucking money trying to convince me that they're a fucking craft brew, when half the shit they make is contract brewed by Coors. AND ITS NOT EVEN THAT FUCKING GOOD. If you consider yourself "A beer guy" and Sam Adams is highfalutin' stuff for you, then you're a moron. Most of their beers are sub par and a few are mediocre at best. The only thing that I thought they did well, and I mean actually well, was their Imperial Series Doppelbock. But it wasn't even THAT good. At least not $10 for a 4-pack good.
I also hate people who call themselves "Beer Guys" and drink nothing but Bud Light. I'm sorry but that doesn't make you a beer guy, it makes you a college frat boy. And if you're not in college then it makes you a drunk. A cheap drunk at that.
First, in defense of Texas wine, the Llano Port is the best inexpensive port wine anywhere, period. And not by a small margin, By miles. But honestly, Llano and Cap Rock are probably the only decent Texas wineries, and they're still only on par with like Kendall Jackson or something. except for that port, which is fucking gold.
Also, while I generally agree that Sam Adams is average at best, I do have to give them credit for the Chocolate Bock (awesomeness. You have to buy that big bottle at least once to try it.) and their Octoberfest (best domestic marzen, without question). And the regular Sam Adams is fine, just nothing exceptional. The rest can largely be left alone.
Getting to the point of the thread, which is crap that sucks.
1. Guys whose 'drink of choice' is Smirnoff Ice or anything remotely in that category. I mean, seriously. Yes, everyone's had one now and again (especially if you were in college when that shit came out), but if that's regularly your drink of choice...grow a pair.
2. McCormick's anything. If you really want to drink rubbing alcohol, just go buy rubbing alcohol.
3. Pretty much everything made by any of the subsidiaries of BudMillerCoors. I'll give Blue Moon a pass for bringing a decent wheat to the masses, and their seasonals aren't bad. I'll also give Icehouse a pass as the only acceptable, cheap, high alcohol content beer for broke college kids. Finally, Keystone gets a pass only as a beer pong beer. Other than that, none of this crap should be allowed to exist.
4. Beers that seem to have been made so bitter and so stout that they're basically undrinkable and exist for the sole reason that the uber-elite beer snobs can rave about how awesome they are. If I wanted to drink something that tasted like shit, I've got sewer lines running under my house I could tap into. If your goal as a 'beer person' is to just find the most repulsive shit that tastes like a mix of mud and motor oil with the bitterness of the worst medicine you ever had to take as a kid to then talk about how 'complex' the flavor is to make yourself look hardcore, good for you but you're a fucking idiot. You're like the people who listen to this shit and act all hardcore.
I will second the Leinenkeugal Berry Weiss as gross. But I won't fault the whole line (see my review) because of that monstrosity. Just like I won't fault the entire Shiner line for the peach abortion that is Shiner Holiday Cheer. Which I would like to add to the "fucking gross" list.
Also, some friends in San Francisco introduced me to Fernet. I like jager, and Fernet makes me want to puke. It's horrid beyond the realm of horrid.
If I'm not mistaken, you put a big shot of Bailey's Irish Cream in your mouth and it sort of hardens (if Bailey's doesn't do this, then I could be completely mistaken on what that substance was). Then, while holding that in your mouth, you put in a shot of tequila and shot of lime juice and mix it up in your mouth. If you swallow prematurely... tastes like shit.
Well, I had it once and was forced to swallow premature because of the volume of liquid in my mouth. I have no clue what it tastes like if you take it correctly.