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Mod Breakdown:
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+893 / +808 |
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Karma Level:
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+ 44
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| Signed up: |
4 years ago (8/26/05) |
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Last signed in:
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1 year ago |
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Total time online:
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13d 17h 57m |
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I just read an article....
on the dangers of drinking....
Scared me to death.
So that's it!
After today, no more reading!
hehe!
Just alittle sometime to make you smile :-)
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Did you know....
that many nonliving things have a gender?
For example:
1) Ziploc Bags -- They are Male, because they hold everything
in, but you can see right through them.
2) Copiers -- They are Female, because once turned off, it
takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective
reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can
wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
3) Tire -- Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated.
4) Hot Air Balloon -- Male, because, to get it to go anywhere,
you have to light a fire under it and, of course, there's the
hot air component.
5) Sponges -- Female, because they're soft, squeezable and
retain water.
6) Web Page -- Female, because it's always getting hit on.
7) Subway -- Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick
people up.
8) Hourglass -- Female, because over time, the weight can shift
to the bottom.
9) Hammer -- Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last
5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.
10) Remote Control -- Female. Ha! You thought it'd be male.
But consider this -- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost
without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons
to push, he keeps trying.
haha :-)
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Do you want to know....
my new favorite game?!?!
Guitar Hero II
I'm not really sure what your thoughts are on it... but I think it is one awesome game!
Justin and i had to do some running around last night to get some stuff.... and before we left Walmart.... Justin just had to buy it!
Well... lets just say.... we got home around 5 and I didn't stop playing until about 10 (i have no idea how long Justin was up playing once i was asleep)! Anyways.... it's alot fun! I'm a rock star!!! haha :-)
Yea.... 10:00..... i go to bed early. That is because i have new hours at the daycare. I have to start by 6:30. It's tough. Normally i would start at 7.... but that 30 minutes makes all the difference. I'm so tired when i get home. Today is an exception... but on nights that i have to work at Cabela's.... getting home 30 minutes earlier will allow me to get a full hour nap in before i have to go to work!
I HAVE OFF THIS WEEKEND!!!
Sorry.... i just needed to express my excitement!
Well..... i'm going to do alittle cleaning up before i have to get ready to go to work.... but i just wanted to drop a line.... and say HELLO to everyone!
Peace <3
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Boo!!!! I scared you!!
I know... not really.... but it got your attention.
Anyways.... what's new?
Nothing really here. Work, sleep, work, less sleep! I've been working really long hours the past few days. I've been going right from the daycare to Cabela's.... and at Cabela's because they are so busy... i'm been staying an hour plus in order to close the store down! It's crazy! I used to think something was wrong with the people who worked there because of how nuts of a place it is.... and now.... i'm one of those people!
Yesterday.... i did start alittle later which gave me the opportunity to go to some yard sales. I got a few cute things and a little drawer to put in my new office when we move!
Other than that.... it was off to work at 1:00. Today i start work at 9:15.... it sucks because i just closed last night till 10.... but i'll be down at 6:15 today. YIPPIE!!!!!
Well..... you know me and my bad jokes.... Here you go!
(P.S. this one is pretty funny!)
Can Cold Water Clean Dishes?
This is for all the germ conscious folks that worry about
using cold water to clean.
John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very
secluded, rural area of Georgia.
After spending a great evening chatting the night away,
John's grandfather prepared breakfast
of bacon, eggs and toast. ...
However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate,
and questioned his grandfather asking,
"Are these plates clean?"
His grandfather replied, "They're as clean as cold water can
get them...Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!"
For lunch the old man made hamburgers. Again,
John was concerned about the plates
as his appeared to have tiny specks around the edge
that looked like dried egg and asked,
"Are you sure these plates are clean?"
Without looking up the old man said,
"I told you before, Sonny,
those dishes are as clean as
cold water can get them.
Now don't you fret, I don't want to hear
another word about it!"
Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town
and as he was leaving,
his grandfather's dog started to growl,
and wouldn't let him pass.
John yelled and said,
"Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car".
Without diverting his attention from
the football game he was watching on TV,
the old man shouted ..........
"COLDWATER, GO LAY DOWN!!!!"
hehe! Did you laugh (or at least smile)?!?!
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Oh No!!!
I left Justin drink and type!
That is never good!
I've been busy working... sorry i haven't posted in a few days.... so keep you proud of me (or annoyed) here's another LOL joke!!
BOSS WALKED INTO THE OFFICE ONE MORNING NOT KNOWING THAT HIS
ZIPPER WAS
DOWN AND HIS FLY AREA WAS WIDE OPEN.
HIS SECRETARY WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID, "BOSS THIS MORNING
WHEN YOU LEFT
YOUR HOUSE, DID YOU CLOSE YOUR GARAGE DOOR?"
THIS WAS NOT A PHRASE HER BOSS UNDERSTOOD, SO HE WENT INTO HIS
OFFICE
LOOKING A BIT PUZZLED. WHEN HE WAS ABOUT DONE WITH HIS
PAPERWORK, HE
SUDDENLY NOTICED THAT HIS ZIPPER WAS NOT ZIPPED UP. HE ZIPPED
UP AND
REMEMBERING WHAT HIS SECRETARY HAD TOLD HIM, FINALLY
UNDERSTOOD.
THEN HE INTENTIONALLY WENT OUT TO ASK FOR A CUP OF COFFEE FROM
HIS
SECRETARY. WHEN HE REACHED HER DESK, HE SAID "WHEN YOU SAW THE
GARAGE DOOR
OPEN DID YOU SEE MY HUMMER PARKED IN THERE?"
THE SECRETARY SMILED FOR A MOMENT AND SAID, "NO BOSS I DIDN'T.
ALL I SAW
WAS A MINI VAN WITH 2 FLAT TIRES."
haha!
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You Know You Love Me....
Because i post bad jokes for the day!
Here Goes....
Wisdom
Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large, raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, "God, please give me the strength to cross the river."
Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice.
After witnessing that, the second man prayed, "God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river."
Poof! God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once.
Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed, "God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river."
Poof! He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.
hehe:-)
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Hello Everyone!
What's new?
Nothing really here! Just chillin after an eventful weekend!
1st - Worked Friday night
2nd - Went to a few yard sales Saturday morning where Justin got a gun cabinet for $20 and i bought some cute things for our new apartment (really my new office!)
3rd - Met a fellow the rest of you might know.....Tomii... anyways.... check in Justin's and Tomii's journals for more information!
FYI... hehe.... i took the funny picture of the man in the scuba gear!!
anyways....
4th - went to my grandmothers birthday party where there was a moon bounce for the kids. Haven't be in one of those in years.... and after all the pain and suffering the past two days... now i know why! But over all... it was really fun! I think the adults spent more time in it than the kids :-)
5th - Did alot of napping on Sunday
Overall... not a bad weekend!
Today was my first day back at work because the center where i work at was closed last week! It was hard getting back in the swing of things... but overall... ok!
Until i got home!!!!!
Justin and i had to do some shopping! Get in the car... and i get about a half of a block for our place.. and the car dies!
AHHHHH!!!
I call my dad... the car won't start.... he even tried to jump start it... the car won't start! Take a trip to Western Auto... the guy thinks he knows what it is!
However... for some dumb reason.... i think i know more than the guy at the store... and question (for whatever reason) if the car may be out of gas (seeing that before we were going to hit the store it was very important that i get gas first). Turns out.... i'm an IDIOT.. and really did run out of gas! Boy.... that was silly! I'm glad that's all it was though... i really couldn't afford a new car right now!
Well... i'd post a joke... but you are probably tired of reading this long boring email....
so.. i'm out!
<3
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My bad joke for the Day!
How Rubber Gloves Are Made ~
Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves you can remember this..
A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was
nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
"Do you know how they make these gloves?" he asked.
"No, I don't," she replied.
"Well," he spoofed, "there's a building in Mexico with a big tank of
latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their
hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes
of the right size." She didn't crack a smile.
"Oh, well. I tried," he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she
burst out laughing.
"What's so
funny?" he asked.
"I was just envisioning how condoms are made!"
Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working!
:-)
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