Quote from Thaddeus Guy McWhat"It's belt fed and runs on a hemi engine." Other:"It's a car?" "It has cartridges." Other:"It's a gun? A big gun?" "I don't think so. It's called a minigun." Other:Why is it belt fed and has a hemi engine if it's called a minigun?" "...It's a big gun."
Nerd RantSo,I've been playing Skyrim gratuitously. Like,abused like a cheap whores asshole gratuitously. And I have some things to say about it,having the downloadable content and all,and having beaten the story a few times.
First,I hate the downloadable content. Yes,the first (last for ps3) is interesting with the content. The last (first for the Ps3) is kind of nice with a change of scenery and again,additional content in craft and stuff. References to Morrowind,which I never played,and the like,was cool. But repetitive story wise. Don't believe me? Knights of the Nine from Oblivion: Evil lord,broken knighthood,hero fixes it and everyone is safe. Dawnguard: Evil Lord,broken knighthood,hero fixes everything or breaks it.
Shivering Isles: Enter Oblivion,meet a God,fix things,become a God. Dragonborn: Enter Solstheim,find book,enter Oblivion,meet a God,fix things,become a God('s tool)
Repetitive. So,to fix this,let me rant about this: What the fuck happened to the Dwemer? Why is it that the Falmer seem to be advancing,slowly,but no one cares? What about the Blades? The Thalmor? With the civil war over,depending on which side,what happens to the political balance of Skyrim? What about the Dragons? If they just seem to appear from creation,what about when the last one dies? What about Paarthunax?
All this,and more,seems to be just scraped aside. "Oh,we need to make a downloadable content for Skyrim? Why not a cleverly hidden ingenious idea from oblivion and cover it up with a completely lame concept on an existing factor from the previous installments? Then,for the third one,we just sorta turn about being a Daedric Lord to serving one indirectly. And add some shit about owning a house."
Bethesda,Bethesda,Bethesda. The fans are very much the priority to keep your cocks wet,so as one,I'd like to tell you you are SUCKING AT YOUR JOB. I like Skyrim at its base. At the core,it is a game that I can munch on all day. But the extra content is almost not even worth it. It's almost contrived,and makes me not even want to spend time discovering the new worlds and makes want to stay more to where I want to finish the basics: The Dark Brotherhood,Thieves Guild,Companions,Mage's College. That stuff. Then afterward,I realize I need to pretty much create a new character to personify all the options for the new quest lines.
I just want something new. I want some answers. in fact,you know what? Because I know so much about TES universe,I'd almost want to go to the island of Akavir and fuck me a snake person with a dragonbone axe. Something outlandish and interesting instead of a fucking vampires. And a dragon priest storyline.
God bless, Flounder the Spawn,Argonian Mage of the College of Winterhold
Game ideaICP,Eminem,Tech N9ne. Plot somewhere... Vampire acting like zombies who are really pixies,so Baseheads Led by Eddy Izzard. Music from all three companies(Psychopathic Record,Eminem,Strangeland) Weapons system from zombies/Army of TWO Get in some other people,Bruce Campbell,Kevin Smith(Jay too),other peoples. Graphics of TF2.
Redux Catch-UpOkay,I know I said I wasn't gonna do this,but family was over,guns were involved(fun time,not murder time). Not like you guys give a shit,but i might as well give some explanation. I do not like doing this for the record,so I'm not gonna save up a bunch of days on purpose. Plus,a lot more detail will be put in,instead of,"I pharted" *does stuff* "I pharted again".
Day 5: Game that reminds you of someone
Last time,I had a nostalgic moment in remembrance to my brother. But I'm no longer going to put that on here,because while remembering him is fine,I'm beating it to death. So here's one I say out of honesty. Metal Gear Solid 4 This reminds me of my cousin. Especially the character,(pick your adjective) Snake. For one,the two smoke. A lot. The two,while usually picking out dames,can't hold onto a woman that well,but they make friends. And enemies. But i have to say,i think Snake has it rougher,because his morality keeps him from snapping Meryl's neck,as annoying of a bitch she is. Cover Art:
Day 6: Game that disturbs you This is a tough one,as really,even Doom 3 isn't a bother. Even F.E.A.R. doesn't do anything for me. Though there is some shit that spooks me,I haven't found a game that I've played that scares the shit out of me. But I will go for some wicked shit that has gotten to me. And I have played it. Bioshock Rapture looks fun when you have the powers of fucking physics,but on a hard difficulty,you realize how fragile mortality is,especially when you face a Big Daddy. It's difficult. But just the heart racing combat is what gets me,when you are trying to save precious bullets,and you can't kill anyone with the standard melee. It's just intense. Cover Art:
Day 7: A Game that you have played an obssesively amount of time Oh,I could say this with about every game I have. At one point or another moments not spent doing something else have been set on one game or another. But one game to rise above them all,and one to bind them,was one that has yet to have DLC due to my stubborn PS3 playing. Skyrim At one point or another,I've created,overwritten,deleted,and started over each and everyone of my characters in Skyrim,starting small and heading all the way higher than I expected to. From killing Alduin to fixing all the fucking guilds,I have done each quest at one point or another. And it has been fun. The only thing that would have made it worth it is if they added guns,but then it would've been the Elder Scrolls: Fallout.(Hint,Bethesda. Hint,hint.) Cover Art:
Day 8: A Game you can beat in a small amount of days Now this one is tricky,as anyone of my games,I try one easy,then medium,then go to the HARDEST DIFFICULTY POSSIBLE. But I digress. But i believe in the grand scheme of things,even if it means going prone the whole time,I can beat this game SERIES in one day of hardened gaming. Modern Warfare Series Now,people might start getting antsy,saying COD is as easy as an Amsterdam prostitute,but it is,so shut the fuck up. All it is is point,shoot,do maybe one other thing other than that,then go on a time limit sprint and get shot at,dying several times because health regen does not activate fast enough. So yes,even on Veteran,which quips "you will not survive",even on a slow ass crawl,I can probably speed run it in about a span of three or four days,a week tops. And I believe Ghost was an overrated character. Cover Art:
Day 9: Favourite Character in video gaming Now,this has changed,and this is not a final answer. But,I do have some mad respect for some,mad respect for others. From Leon S. Kennedy to Isaac Clarke,to Grayson Hunt to Jack Cayman,I have played a lot of characters. Now,I'm not gonna be a dick and just say characters who have a generalized title,but no real definite characteristic except for what the players do to fill in the so called "void". But now,I think it's time for my favorite character. However,from past opinions,it may surprise people who care. Dante Alighieri First off,I was sort of wrong. While the plot is sort of contrived off the basic fact your guy has to go to hell in order to save his love,it's sort of depressing how close he comes,then how far he really has to go. He was a crusader in the (you guessed it) Crusades,and was a drunkard,a lover of flesh and things of the now. He killed without any remorse,and this cost him the life of his friend. After his apparent death,he goes home to Florence,having found he was damning himself and those around him from his actions,and cheating Death itself. He goes home to find his father was slain,and his lover was killed as well,all for the fact he slept with a prisoners wife. After seeing the soul of his lover,Beatrice,be taken to Hell and denied Paradise,he pursues,taking on the armies of Hell itself. After facing off harlots of hell,minions,great beasts,and even coming onto the second death of his father,and his best friend,who was Beatrice's brother,he confronts her,only having found it too late,that she was corrupted,because he betrayed her,and his promise. He finally came down to Fraud,right before Treachery,and confessed his sin,claiming he was wrong all along,and that he was supposed to be damned,and it was right that he was punished. After hearing this,he somehow absolves his love,and sends her to paradise. After confronting the Devil himself,he finds out that he was really dead. however,with the help of absolved souls,he claims his place in Paradise. Picture:
Day 4: Game that makes you sadI've played a lot of soul-crushing games. And a lot of head-crushing games,so I haven't really played a game that makes me...sad. No tear jerkers,nothing has made me absolutely break down. But games do have that artistic value,and I can say a game that might have brought me to tears,were I the kind of person to cry at the losses of some computer generated folk. Fallout 3 Okay,I know it sounds out there with the amount of weapon play and the karmic choices,but really think past all that down to the character. Sure,everyone's Lone Wanderer chose a different path,but think for a moment the trauma he goes through in life. At birth,his/her mom dies during labor. Then,throughout his life in the vault,he/she is harassed and forced to become a vault patron,although there are some hints as to not being from the vault in the first place. Then,dad leaves,the best friend is killed,and he/she is forced to leave. Depending on the decisions growing up,he/she is now a callous individual,or a might bit curious to outside,or someone who is trying to go out to find dad to make things better. Along the way,choices are made,that show a callous,upstanding,or nondenominational character,which leads to the meeting of your dad,who was,in the end,trying to find a way to give your mother her wish;the waters of life,freely,to those who are athirst. However,before you can really get any work done,you witness soldiers holding your father and some scientists at gunpoint,and you're forced to watch him die to save you. Whether the Lone wanderer is more callous or more upstanding,or no different,he/she now has to combat the enclave,and,in the end,save or harm the wasteland. And,in the end(w/o GOTY or Broken steel DLC),the Lone Wanderer has to choose whether to save the wasteland and die,or send someone else in(Lyons,I believe,will go in w/o DLC),or let the device destroy you and everyone around it. A lot gets put up on your shoulders,not to mention the side quests which can damper your reputation or make you a star among the wastes. That's enough to make me think about it.
Day 3: Game that makes you laughLast entry was Manhunt. While it did get me going sometimes,it was more for the sheer carnage. Who doesn't love chocking someone out with a bat,then taking said club and plastering their brains all over the wall? Me? Nobody else? Alright then. So,last time was shock value. This time is the real deal. Madworld I absolutely love this game. It takes Manhunt,adds Tank Dempsey(Steve Blum,voice actor for the real main hero,Jack Cayman),Marcus Fenix(John DiMaggio,voice actor for one of the announcers),and puts a whole new spin on the fight for your life any way shape and form. With Manhunt,you had Cash,whose first name escapes me,who was a death row inmate who was sedated to being though dead,then turned into a money making scheme by some dirty old man who was out to make the best snuff film. Or something like that. It relied on stealth,being that it was not the best idea to take on several people bare fisted or with a crowbar. It had graphic executions,that had actually influenced a murder in the UK(later to be found in Child's Play,but it was still brought up). It was an eerie surreal reality show that was more for survival than anything else. You were just trying to get away with your life. In Madworld,the concept is relatively the same,but with a little less stealth(a whole lot,by the way),and more for how much you can really kill someone to death. The player character is a special agent Ex-Marine former police officer(some kind of juggernaut mix) who gets twisted into this Deathwatch game. Apparently this guy had a bur up his ass,and he wanted to watch people do crazy shit. So he cut off a city,both by transportation and technologically,and had a bunch of people killing each other for the antidote to some super virus. Your guy kills giant mutants,crazy undead,supernatural and sci-fi beasties,and of course,other people,to get to the bottom of the conspiracy.
Bottom line: In both games,you kill things. In Madworld,you kill them harder and funnier! Madworld is a little more open,and there isn't a sense of urgency. Of course,you're rewarded for the graphic kills,more graphic,more fantasic,and getting it done on time,and you get hilarious background commentary from two announcers who are watching the whole thing. (From where,I have no clue.) Cover Art:
Day 2: Least Favorite Video GameOkay,last time I said Halo. Now,this was biased because I had assholes shitting on PS3 and completely fucking my opinion of the series,first to last. It's a great series,but it has gotten over rated. To me anyways. But I digress. The reality of the situation,I actually like the series I shat on last time,Mass Effect and Halo. Granted,I only played a demo of the second mass effect,and I haven't played much more than Halo 3 ODST's first level or so,but I do have familiarity. I do like the concepts,I just don't like the approach,per say. Reach was a good prequel,as it sounded and looked,but I don't have a 360,so personally,I don't care. And....I don't a have a 360,so Mass Effect doesn't appeal much better or worse. So I'm not gonna oogle how great they are or how bad they are. They look nice,but lack a few key characteristics that make them good. Preferably the fact I can't play them. Enough about that. The real item on today is my least favorite game. The first was good,and apparently the third was great. But I have a problem with the middle child of the coup. Killzone 2 It starts with the plot,which takes off from the second. Sevchenko,a soldier for the ISA,takes his role among others,including the first games Rico,who attempts to take on the Helghast on their own shores. This gets bad when they realize how in over their head they are. They go through several areas of Helghan to finally meet up with the Commissar arch-type who is guarded by a teleporting ass hole with a series of cheap attacks. Rico ends up killing the man,who,in his dying breath,lets them know the floodgates are open to destroy the ISA. Sev moves out as fleets of warships hang overhead. Credits role. The game play lacked severely. The secondary firing modes were scrapped,only one long arm was allowed over two different firearms. The health system was advanced,but still,as with COD and other modern shooters,the health seemed to never heal up fast enough for me to get back in the action,and I ended up crawling til I could gun again. Helghast,with the first one,were insanely tough. And the variety was still,as always,very limiting,and I ALWAYS had one or two character types I HAD to watch out for. It was not fun as a shooter,and killed the series when they took out the variety of characters to play through with,and the different dialogues based on who you played as. Cover Art:
Day 7: A Game that you have played an obssesively amount of time
Day 8: A Game you can beat in a small amount of days
Day 9: Favourite Character in video gaming
Day 10: A Game that kicks ass
Day 11: A Game from your favourite Developers
Day 12: Best Racing game
Day 13: Best Fighting Game
Day 14: A Game that no one would expect you to love
Day 15: A Game that you wish was real
Day 16: A Game that you used to love but now hate
Day 17: Your Best Platformer
Day 18: Your Favourite Part in a game
Day 19: A line from your favorite Game
Day 20: Your Favourite Soundtrack for a game
Day 21: A underated Game you enjoy
Day 22: Best Multiplayer
Day 23: Best Scary Game
Day 24: A Game that deserves a sequel
Day 25: Best FPS
Day 26: The hardest game you have ever played
Day 27: A Game you wish you got in Pre-order
Day 28: A game that inspires you to do things
Day 29: A Video Game from your childhood
Day 30: What are you playing right now ______________________________ Decided to make a redux because my last one I neglected completely for some time,and then did some catching up. Now I think some things deserve some good old fashioned sit down talking about. Not just the first thing that comes to mind. We'll start off with the first on the list: 1.) Favorite Game: This is a hard decision,as I haven't played very many game recently that put me up in a place where I said "THIS IS GREAT". None...except for Fallout 3. With the game of the year edition,I have all the downloadable content,so it's hours of fun and happiness. And yes,I did get the Bloody Mess perk.(Mandatory for all characters great and small) Cover Art: