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| Signed up: |
7 years ago (8/05/05)
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4 years ago
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Red Vs. Blue quotes:Caboose
Caboose while learning how to drive Sheila: No, wait, stop, go back! Why are there six pedals if there are only four directions?
Caboose, confused after finding out Tex is a chick with a really agressive AI in her armor, is asked by Church if he gets the explanation: ...That Tex guy is really a robot... and you're his boyfriend... so that makes you... a gay robot!
Caboose, after Tucker is struck down by a rocket: Church, how come Tucker gets to nap during battles, and I don't?
Caboose, trying to contribute to an argument on irony: I think it would be ironic if we were all made out of iron!
Caboose: It's like we're real soldiers!
Caboose, standing in the water: My toes... are get-ting pruney.
Caboose, standing in room of teleporters, all of them glowing green: I think we should take the green one.
Caboose finds a dead soldier with the same colour armor as him, and Sarge explains to him that the dead soldier isn't him: Oh, good [sigh of relief]. At first, I thought that was me, because -- I am blue -- and -- I like to sleep. But, if he is dead that cannot be me. That would be silly.
Caboose, after coming across a field of dead soldiers: Look! More sleeping people! It must be naptime! But who has naptime now? Nap time comes before pants time, not after. I think these people are just making up times!
Caboose, describing a room to Sarge: There are some walls... and some ceilings. Wait, just one ceiling.
Caboose, getting in touch with his dark side: I am thinking about kittens... gah! Kit-tens covered in spikes! That... makes... me angry! [leaps down among Battle Creek players] YEEEAAARRRHHHHHH!.... MY NAME IS MICHAEL J. CABOOSE... AND I HATE BABIES!
Caboose speaks to the dead Battle Creek players after his berserker killing spree: I WILL EAT YOUR UNHAPPINESS!
Caboose: YOUR TOAST HAS BEEN BURNED, AND NO AMOUNT OF SCRAPING WILL REMOVE THE BLACK PARTS!
Caboose: I don't want to be dead! I want to be alive! Or, a cowboy!
Carboose: We're in the future! Things are very shiny here.
Caboose, while looking for the mark to set the bomb on comes across the X: That is not an X... that is a plus sign.
Caboose: And Sheila will love me again. And this time, for who I am. And not just for my stunning good looks... but for those too.
Caboose: Time... line..? *sighs* [in a very, hello? duh? kinda way] Time isn't made of lines!! [matter of factly:] It is made out of circles. That is why clocks are round!
Caboose: I call it nap time. Which is just before food time. And then comes food-nap time. And thats my favourite time of all...
Caboose: So I say to the guy, How're you going to get the tank down to the planet? And he goes, I'll just put it on the ship. And I go, if you've got a ship that can carry a tank, why not just put guns on the ship and use it instead?
Caboose: That does not sound like me. I like people. ...And buildings also.
Caboose, yelling in anguish: SHIEEE-LAAAA! Come back to meee! I made you a muffin!
Caboose, talking to the bomb: Come on, Andy! Think of a happy place!
Caboose, upon being told that Tex punches people in the head in their sleep: That... was... you? I thought the Tooth Fairy was mad at me!
Caboose, trying to help Church while his legs didn't work: Why don't you try...walking on your hands? Then you can use your feet for high fives, eatin sandwiches...you know, the important stuff.
[edit]
Church
Church, to self, dreamily ogling the tank: You know what? I could blow up the whole goddamn world with this thing.
Church: I can't believe I actually died for this war.
Church, dying, to Tucker [strained]: I just want you to know... I always hated you. I always hated you the most.
Church, after the two teams have been arguing over irony for two hours: Okay. We all agree that while the current situation is not totally ironic, the fact that we now have to work together is odd in an unexpected way, that defies our normal circumstances. Is everyone happy with that?
Church to the Church in Caboose's mind: First of all, you? You're not Caboose's best friend. Okay? You don't have a best friend. You know why? You don't need one! You're Church! Knowing other people just waters down the experience! Live the dream, buddy!
Church on realising his turning off of Sheila's friendly fire function caused his death: Oh NO! I'm the teamkilling fucktard!
Church after possesing Lopez: [In Spanish] Guys, I need to give... you a... warning... What? Why am I speaking Spanish? I don't know Spanish!
Church, in response to Gary's intro: Does your society have any other adjectives besides the word GREAT?
Church (to O'Malley): I have half a mind to kill you, and the other half agrees.
[edit]
Tucker
Tucker, after Caboose accidentally shoots Church: You shot Church, you team-killing fucktard!
Tucker, after finding out that Tex is a girl: You should blame God, first he makes hangovers, then he makes half women-half sharks that won't even sleep with me. Thanks for nothing, God!
Tucker, under breath: Man, you can't pick up chicks in a tank!
Tucker, talking about the tank: You know what? Forget what I said before. We can definitely pick up chicks in this thing. Probably two or three chicks apiece!
Tucker, to Church, jovially: Dude, women are like Voltron. The more you can hook up, the better it gets.
Tucker: 16 days?! That's almost two weeks!
Tucker, to Caboose: I'm sorry, what? It's kind of hard to hear you over the sound of your constant team killing.
Tucker, talking about modding a Warthog they found on postapocalyptic Earth: All my life, I've had girls tell me, "Not if you were the last man on Earth." Well, that may be true, but let's see what happens when I'm the last man on Earth with a sweet-ass, pimped-out ride, bitch!
Tucker, sounding disappointed: Oh, fuckberries.
Tucker: Aw, man, I hate plans. That means we have to do stuff.
[edit]
Sarge
Sarge, not taking advice about static electricity: C'mon. That's an urban legend used to sell those stupid bracelets. And I suppose pop rocks and soda are going to make my stomach blow up! [ZZT] Yow!
Sarge is told that Donut needs
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